Tuesday, August 12, 2008

S-s-s-s A-a-a-a F-f-f-f E-e-e-e T-t-t-t Y-y-y-y

Safety. Dance!

Ha! Any of you between the ages of 30 - 45 are now singing the totally tubular techno-rific 80's song from Men Without Hats!

So what's all this dancing got to do with personal hygiene? Nothing. It's the "safety" part we'll be discussing today. As in "Safety Razor".


Don't go running off in horror like I'm wearing a leather mask and chasing you with a chainsaw. I *promise* you it won't hurt a bit! Trust me, I have, like, six left thumbs and four toes on the ends of my hands and I haven't cut myself yet.

That's a lie. I did cut myself. But just once, and, if we're being honest, I've managed to cut myself with a traditional disposable Venus razor too.

Anyhow, I switched to a safety razor back in May, after Beth had convinced me it was a safe alternative to plastic razors. I found my "vintage" razor online at eBay. Which is a fancy way of saying that I got to pay more for something used. Cuz that's how eBay rolls. Also following Beth's advice, I purchased approximately one shitload of metal razor blades off eBay, which should last me the rest of my shaving life, with enough leftover for the kids' inheritances. Lucky them.

Of course, there are other hair removal options available. Just last week, Crunchy extolled the virtues of sugaring. I would try this, but I prefer to keep my skin attached to my body. Also, I'm way over on weekly quota of loud shrieks of "AAAIIIIEIEEEIEEE-OHMYGOURDOODLE-WHATTHEFUCK-MOTHERHUMPER?!?!!!" But feel free to try her homemade sugaring recipe. And if you need some left over fabric scraps to use as waxing strips, just let me know.

So your challenge, should you choose to accept it, is to find a shaving method that doesn't make you cry like a baby or bleed to death, that is also environmentally friendly. Would love to hear the solutions! Chat it up at the Yahoo! Group.

We can dance if we want to. We can leave your friends behind. Cuz your friends don't dance and if they don't dance, well, they're no friends of mine.

hehehehe. You'll be ready to kick my ass around 3pm today when you can't get that dingity dang song out of your head!


ib mommy said...

Aaaahhhhh.... mentally shoving q-tips in my ears! How can you get that song stuck in my head right before bed and then try to convince me to buy razor blades!

greeen sheeep said...

Thanks, thanks a lot.

I hadn't thought about the video in a long time.

What's with that weird little side move with arms in a circle above their heads?

Great now I will be lying in bed awake half the night with that playing in my head.

Well, you certainly are no friend of mine.

Robj98168 said...

We can dance if we want to
We can leave your friends behind
'Cause your friends don't dance and if they don't dance
Well they're no friends of mine
I say, we can go where we want to
A place where they will never find
And we can act like we come from out of this world
Leave the real one far behind
And we can dance...
heh heh NOw look what you started
Try a Preserve Razor They re made from recycled plastic and even have a way to recycle them again! But the safety razor should work for you

organicneedle said...

I use the Preserve razors. The blade heads last at least a couple of months. One pack should last you a year...unless you are a wookie with self-hate issues. They will even take the handles back if for whatever reason you are done with it, like the their toothbrushes. Besides being terrified of safety razors, I like throwing a little money towards a company doing the right thing

jennconspiracy said...

I got a vintage safety razor online ages ago but my disposables aren't exhausted yet... I have kinda stopped shaving except for every month or every other. I have very light/blonde body hair so it isn't a big deal. :)

I'm looking forward to using my safety razor but it's probably not going to happen for a few more months.

Wendy said...

I just bought a gadget that's supposed to sharpen your razor blades and make them last a lot longer. I haven't tried it yet, but I plan to post about it when I've conducted a proper test.

Chile said...

I'm sorry. I cannot participate in this one. After stocking up on razor blades last year (for my way old Gilette Sensor Excel for women), I suddenly realized I didn't give a crap if my legs and pits were shaved. So I quit. In fact, just now I had to go look at the old razor to even see what brand it was.

Yep, I'm just an old furry hippie.

ib mommy said...

Jeez, you guys. First I go to bed AND wake up singing the safety dance and now I've got the image of a hairy chile pepper dancing around in my head.....

curiousalexa said...

I've never shaved my thighs, because the hair is so thin and blond. My calves, not so blond. In (unintentionally!) keeping the 80s theme, I got to wondering the other day about the spray-on hair lightner that used to be the rage. IIRC, it was basically peroxide to give you highlights when out in the sun (or under a hot hairdryer). Could I do that with my leg hair?

The Purloined Letter said...

I go hairy too. It is much faster....

My husband is thinking about getting a safety razor, though. I'll pass along your positive opinion to him!

leslie said...

Back at ya, Burbanmom...


Anonymous said...

I have never understoond what my friends' behinds had to do with anything and why they should be the subject of an 80's dance hit. That said, you should have heard Terrible Person's rendition at our wedding reception. It was awesome. Here's a photo. You'll just have to imagine the music.

Oh forget it. I just looked at the photo. It's too freaky to share. Okay, just imagine the picture too.

And yeah, I'm glad you like the safety razor. My razors will last 'til I'm dead cuz I never have time to use them, ackshully.

Tammi said...

Well that's a thought. I wonder if I can convince my husband to switch? We could even share one. Haha!

I went hairy last summer. After 2 months, I felt unpleasant and started shaving again.

Joan said...

Now that song will be going through my head. I haven't gone green about shaving.

cristele said...

that's my dad's razor.
I did use it a couple of time but that's scary.
Once, he changed the blade without telling me(Ok like he knew i was using it...) and I removed my skin on several inches. Ouch! I can still see the darker mark, 20 years later.
So be careful lady, those blades will make you bleed.
Ok here is one trick we agreed on to make all our family happy (turned out my sister and my mum were using my dad's razor and he did not like it when he found out)...He would give us his USED blades so they are less hard on our soft lady's hair and skin. USED by a man blade. That's the trick...well of course you need to make sure you share the same diseases first :-)

knutty knitter said...

I shaved a bit as a teen but then decided why should I do what everyone else does. Nature gave me hair so I just wear it :)

I did try shaving underarms last summer but it felt so bad I vowed never to do it again.

I do shave the upper lip which has got worse hair than ever and really was impacting what's left of my image. I go through about one razor a year so in about 20 years I might switch to a safety razor. (I bought a 20 pack a couple of years back!)

viv the hairy in nz